The Triad
RYMELLAN 3: THE TRIAD
Sarah Ettritch
Published by Norn Publishing at Smashwords
Copyright 2012 Sarah Ettritch
All rights reserved. No part of this ebook may be reproduced, except for brief quotations in articles or reviews, without written permission from the author.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are the product of the author’s imagination and are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
Smashwords Edition, Licensing Notes
This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.
Rymellan 3: The Triad was edited by Marg Gilks
Cover design by Boulevard Photografica/Patty G. Henderson
Dedication
For Monica and Alison
Acknowledgements
The usual suspects: Jennifer Brinkman, my partner and beta reader; Marg Gilks, my editor; Patty Henderson, my cover designer. Thank you.
TABLE OF CONTENTS
No Going Back
Crossroads
Convergence
Chosens
Joined
Other Titles by Sarah Ettritch
NO GOING BACK
Lesley sank into her chair and flicked on her comm station, relieved that she was finally behind a closed office door. While striding through the lobby and corridors, she’d felt as if she were an impostor. How could she have denied her Chosen? What would her peers think, if they knew? She’d initially looked forward to her day off after the awards ceremony, but had spent it cringing as others admired the Medal of the Protector. Even Jason had dropped by to see it, after he’d beeped Mama to make sure Jayne wasn’t around. Lesley had desperately wanted the day to end, but had also dreaded returning to duty.
With a sigh, she viewed her schedule for the day. Two reminders deepened her shame: the orientation for the commander training program would start in three days, and she and Jayne were due for another forced outing to satisfy Berry—and annoy Mo. Merely seeing Jayne’s name made Lesley feel like a failure; spending time with her would be excruciating. Last time they’d met alone, Jayne had confided that she didn’t believe they were Chosens. Could Lesley blame her? Everyone seemed to forget about the Way when dealing with Jayne, so she could be excused for suspecting that the Chosen Council had deliberately thrown her into a triad. The logic behind her conclusion couldn’t be denied. Lesley, on the other hand, had no excuse. None whatsoever.
Someone rapped sharply on the door, then swung it open. Lesley’s heart sank when Laura stepped into the office. She wished she could talk to her, unload the shame and confusion that had distracted her since the awards ceremony. But although Lesley hadn’t committed a violation, Laura would be terribly disappointed, perhaps angry, if she found out how easily Lesley had dismissed Jayne. Lesley didn’t want to lose the respect of someone she considered a role model. The shame was already difficult enough to bear without others knowing about her weakness.
“Good morning,” Laura said cheerfully. “I know you’re trying to wrap up two opinions for Blair before the training program, but do you have time to investigate a situation in B3? I doubt it’s anything, but we need to check it out and everyone else is busy.”
“Sure,” Lesley replied, hoping she’d be able to concentrate on Blair’s cases when she returned.
“Great, I’ll dispatch the details,” Laura said as Lesley rolled back her chair. “I’ve set up a meeting with Blair tomorrow, to discuss how we’ll work things while you’re doing your training. I have the impression she wants to cling to as much of your time as she can.”
Lesley could hear the amusement in Laura’s voice as she turned and reached for her cloak, and felt relieved that, with her back to Laura, she didn’t need to force a smile.
“She’s insisting that we meet over lunch. She wants to take us to that new eatery everyone’s raving about, to congratulate us on our medals.”
“That’s nice of her,” Lesley said, managing to sound enthusiastic.
“I’ll put it on your calendar. And I’ll let you get going. I know you have lots of work waiting for you.” With a nod, Laura left.
Lesley braced herself before leaving her office to walk the corridors again. Not in the mood to talk to anyone, she groaned when her comm unit beeped. She glanced at it, prepared to let the beeper leave a message—she was in the middle of rushing to investigate a tip, after all—but then changed her mind when she read the name.
“I beeped Ross to let her know I’ll do the Basic Maneuvers 1-B practicum,” Mo said after they’d exchanged greetings. “She wants me to be more involved this time. Apparently they want to make a few changes to the requirements and she wants my input, so she suggested I attend a couple of meetings. I said I would. They’re hands-on meetings, otherwise I would have tried to get out of it.”
Lesley chuckled.
“The thing is, she’s on 72 for the next couple of weeks, so that’s where they’re meeting. I said I’d go up on Friday and stay until Monday.”
An idea formed as Lesley pushed open one of the double doors and stepped into the morning sunshine. “Why don’t you take Jayne with you?” If Mo agreed, Lesley could delay her forced outing with Jayne until next week.
Mo hesitated. “I don’t know, she went up with me not that long ago. And this time I won’t be around as much. The meetings sound like all day affairs.”
“Oh.” Lesley wasn’t proud of what she was about to do, but she did it anyway. “Then perhaps it is better that Jayne stay down here. She might not want to be on 72 for three nights, and we’re due for another lunch for Berry. I’ll suggest that we meet while you’re away. There, I’m telling you in advance.” She held her breath.
Silence, then, “You know, you’re right, it wouldn’t be a bad idea to take Jayne with me. I was only going on Friday because we’re meeting at 10:00 on Saturday. But I can pick Jayne up early Saturday morning, so it’ll only be a two-night stay. I’ll be around in the evenings, so she won’t be alone all the time. And she has to get comfortable being by herself on the station.”
“If you’re sure. But now I’m thinking that I really should see her for lunch, before Berry gets upset.”
“No, no, that can wait,” Mo said quickly. “I doubt Berry will care if you wait a week. I’ll beep Jayne as soon as we disconnect and arrange for her to go with me.”
“All right,” Lesley said evenly. “I’ll let you do that, then. I’m almost at my aviacraft.”
“Your aviacraft?”
“I’m on my way to check something out for Laura.”
“I won’t ask what. I’ll see you later.”
They disconnected. Lesley shook her head and slid the comm unit back into its holder. Manipulating Mo. Yet another reason to be disgusted with herself.
*****
Jayne pressed the comm station’s disconnect button and dropped onto her sofa with a thump. If only she could have come up with a good excuse to not go with Mo to 72. Another trip to 72 didn’t intimidate her, but being with Mo for two days did. It was so unfair! She cherished her growing friendship with Mo and was starting to believe that Mo valued it too. The Chosen Council had forced them together, but Mo had put aside her preconceived notions; her open-mindedness had allowed a genuine bond to form. Jayne no longer felt as if Mo spent time with her solely for d
uty’s sake. For the first time in her adult life, she had a friend, and she’d meant it when she’d said that friendship would be more than enough. She didn’t want those other feelings!
Breathe! Nobody had to know, most of all Mo and Lesley. The danger wasn’t that she’d become involved with one or both of them—neither would ever be interested in her in that way. No, the danger was more insidious than that. If they were to suspect how she felt, it could affect their relationship, the foundation of the triad. Protecting their relationship had to be her priority—nothing else mattered. If she was careful not to let her feelings show, everything would be all right. Lesley and Mo would be none the wiser, they’d all be friends, and the triad would succeed. This Adams would not be involved in a failed Joining.
Fortunately Mo would be in meetings for most of their time on 72. Jayne wanted to spend time with her, but hours on end might be a strain. Oh, if only these feelings would pass! She had to believe they eventually would. Surely they wouldn’t hang around for years when—
The comm station beeped. She tensed, hoping it wasn’t Mo again, or Lesley. Her muscles tightened further when she read the name: Cdre. L. Finney. With trepidation, she pressed the connect button. “Yes, hello.”
“Good morning, Jayne,” Laura said. “I’m going to ask you a question, and you can say no. You’re under no obligation to agree, all right?”
“All right,” she said, her curiosity piqued.
“I’ve spoken to Kevin Stewart’s counsellor, and he wants to arrange a session with you and Stewart. He believes it will help Stewart.”
Help him to do what? Vent his hatred of Papa on her? He couldn’t berate him, so instead he’d berate her?
“As I said, you’re under no obligation to agree,” Laura said into the silence. “I’ll understand if you’d rather not.”
Jayne understood what she symbolized for Stewart. Given Papa’s behaviour, she sympathized with him to a degree. But hadn’t she already endured enough because of the Incident? What did he want from her? He was an overseer. He’d lost his sister, but he still had a life. She’d lost her parents and most of the rest of her family, endured jeers and insults for thirteen years—two men had tried to kill her! He’d said his piece at the awards ceremony. What more did he want?
She couldn’t make it right for him. How could she do for him what she couldn’t do for herself? “I don’t think I can do it. I understand why he’s—it’s hard to accept that someone you love...” Her eyes welled up. Argamon! She took a deep breath and slowly exhaled. “Tell the counsellor no.”
“I will.” Laura didn’t sound upset or surprised.
They said good-bye and disconnected. Deflated, Jayne stared into space. Despite making what she believed to be the right decision, she felt guilty. What if he fell from the Way because she didn’t meet with him? No! She had to stop blaming herself for everything. He’d had thirteen years to deal with the Incident. It wasn’t her fault the triad had put her name on the tip of everyone’s tongue, opening old wounds for some. She had enough problems of her own without trying to solve everyone else’s. Stewart had his family and counsellor to help him.
But that afternoon, as she was about to set off for the Trading Centre to obtain painting supplies, her resolve to not get involved wavered when her comm unit beeped. G. Stewart. No, she wouldn’t answer. She couldn’t. Why wouldn’t they leave her alone?
She groaned when the message indicator appeared on the comm unit’s display. Too conscientious to delete the message without listening to it, she steeled herself and played it:
Yes, um, I probably shouldn’t be doing this, but I don’t know what else to do. I’m Kevin’s—Kevin Stewart’s—Chosen. I know his counsellor asked if you’d meet with him and you refused. Would you reconsider? Please? I don’t know what else to do. He just can’t seem to move past it. I shouldn’t ask, but I’m afraid of losing him. If you won’t do it for him, do it for me and the children. Her voice choked off. Please, she whispered. I’m sorry. The message ended.
Jayne’s hands shook. The woman sounded so despondent. But what could Jayne do? Would meeting with him really help, if all he did was rant at her? What difference would it make? Stewart’s sister would still be dead, Papa would still be a monster, and she’d still be his daughter. Stewart wouldn’t be satisfied until she was executed, and Robert too, for good measure. The man had actively called for her death, not once, but twice!
But it wasn’t his Chosen’s fault. If there was even the slimmest chance that meeting with him would prevent the Incident from taking another papa away from his children...
She felt torn. Deciding she needed time to think it over, Jayne buttoned her cloak and left for the Trading Centre. Applying for art college still didn’t sit well, but neither would linking accounts with Lesley and Mo when she wasn’t doing anything with her life. These days, it felt as if everything she did was to help satisfy other people. It had been easier when she hadn’t had to worry about anyone else. But also lonelier.
*****
Jayne yawned into her hand and fought the urge to stretch out on the sofa and nap. They’d only just returned from supper in the canteen, but Mo had picked her up at 6:45 that morning.
Mo gave her a sympathetic look. “I guess hearing about the launch area isn’t all that exciting.”
“No, it’s not that,” Jayne said, mortified. She relaxed when Mo grinned. “I’m just tired.” Waking at 6:00 wasn’t the only reason behind her fatigue. After spending the day working on the painting for her college application, she was mentally exhausted. The act of painting would have exhilarated her if she hadn’t had to fight against the part of herself that thought applying for college was a bad idea.
“Are you sure you’re just tired?” Mo leaned forward in her chair. “You were very quiet over supper.”
Painting had also kept her mind off the message from Stewart’s Chosen. She still didn’t know what to do. He wasn’t her responsibility, but could she ignore his Chosen’s plea and then live with herself if he fell from the Way?
“Did something happen today? You said you stayed in our quarters, but...”
“I did stay here.”
“What’s wrong, then?”
Mo looked genuinely concerned, but could Jayne talk to her about Stewart? Did Mo want to hear about yet another problem related to the Incident? Jayne was sick of it herself, but she needed advice and Carol wasn’t here. “Laura Finney beeped me a few days ago.”
“What did she want?” Mo asked, surprise raising her voice.
“I guess she talked to Kevin Stewart’s counsellor about what happened at the awards ceremony, and the counsellor said it might help Stewart if I met with him.”
Mo’s mouth dropped open. “Why? So he can get everything off his chest? And you’re supposed to just sit there and take it?”
“That’s what I thought too,” Jayne said. “Laura said I wasn’t under any obligation to do it, so I said no.”
Mo thumped the arm of her chair. “Well, good for you!” She frowned. “You’re not regretting saying no, are you?”
“I wasn’t.” Jayne sighed. “Until his Chosen beeped me.”
“She beeped you! She had no business beeping you! You said no.”
“She’s worried, Mo. You didn’t see him at the ceremony. If he hadn’t come to his senses... I didn’t talk to her. She left a message.” Jayne reached for her comm unit. “Here, I’ll play it for you.”
“Wait.” Mo rose from the chair to come sit next to Jayne, who didn’t mind. To her surprise, she still felt comfortable with Mo. She didn’t understand why, but Mo didn’t rattle her like Lesley did. When she was with Mo, she didn’t feel as if her brain had stopped working, wasn’t worried that something horribly embarrassing would come out of her mouth every time she opened it. But there was no denying that she cared very much for Mo and about what Mo thought of her, so—
“I’m ready.” Mo stared at her.
Jayne quickly pressed the play button. Wh
at had she just been thinking about her brain not working?
Mo’s expression grew sombre as she listened to Stewart’s Chosen. “She sounds desperate,” she murmured when the message ended.
“Yes, she does.”
They sat lost in their own thoughts. Mo broke the silence. “Meeting with him might not help him, though. It could make things worse. You can’t stop him from falling from the Way.”
“But if he does fall from the Way, I’ll always wonder if meeting with him would have helped. You didn’t see him. You weren’t there when he confronted me. I saw—” Jayne stopped. Normally she’d only open up to that extent with Carol.
“What did you see?” Mo prompted.
She either trusted Mo, or she didn’t. “I saw myself. We’re both victims of the Incident.”
Mo snorted. “Come on! He lost a sister. You lost both your parents. It affected you a lot more than it did him.”
Jayne wasn’t sure they could assign value to lives like that. “But it did affect him. He can’t understand why it happened.” Just as she couldn’t. “We both belong to a club nobody wants to belong to.”
“But he hates you. If you meet with him, he’ll just pile on the abuse to make himself feel better.”
“But I’ll know I did what I could,” Jayne said quietly.
Mo’s forehead creased. “You can’t stop him from falling.”
“Perhaps not. But if I meet with him, maybe I won’t feel guilty about it if he does fall.” She looked down at her lap. Tears sprang to her eyes when she felt Mo’s hand on her shoulder.
“It sounds like you need to meet with him,” Mo said. “I’m not sure it’s a good idea, but it sounds like that’s what you need to do.”